Finding Happiness

“Happiness”, it’s this thing everyone talks about – like it’s an unattainable thing.

Something elusive, which only a small percentage of people seem to enjoy – an exclusive and select group that must only be happy because they live in X country, own X items, have X job, X people in their lives, etc… etc…

The reasons, excuses and theoretical jargon we hear all the time, from those who are unhappy, is nothing more than “jargon”. We all have the ability to be happy, whether we have the perfect job, perfect family, house, or not. Whether we’re living the high life, or not. Or whether we’re having problems right now, or not…

Happiness is not that euphoric feeling we all feel after an achievement – happiness isn’t triumphant…

Happiness is steady, solid, unwavering and peaceful.

True, real happiness is being happy, even when things aren’t going smoothly.

Happiness is always with you, even when you’re battling a challenge. That’s not to say that you won’t feel unhappy, but you won’t hit rock bottom, or feel utterly depressed if you realise that it isn’t a fluke — happiness is easily achieved, through daily practice, and will be with you every day, like a best friend.

Happiness is a choice — when you wake up; and you go through your daily rituals, ask yourself the big question – “How do I decide to feel today?”

We all have problems and battles we deal with day in and day out. But while going through your own personal battle, there are moments of calmness, peacefulness, and in those moments… in the lulls, that’s when you can find your happy place.

Look up at the sky, and find something to smile about. Pause and look around you, and smile at something. Just smile. Think to yourself how lovely something looks. Smile at someone you pass – do something which a happy person would do. Appreciate what’s around you right now.

Smile at everything you can – appreciate everything you’re able to do. Have you just gone and bought a coffee? Did you drive to work? Did you walk somewhere? Smile. Because you can, and you did something – smile because you woke up this morning, got out of bed and started your day. Appreciate every small step, every single thing you’ve done today…

Look within – and find something to smile about that’s around you – do this every moment you remember to – and if you can’t remember to do it, add a reminder to your phone, or calendar, computer… write it on a sticky note and put it on your bedroom door…. anywhere you can to help you get into the habit of smiling and taking a second to appreciate something you see, or have done…

Happiness is a daily choice. Every time you wake up, you have a momentary decision – are you going to be happy today, or not?

Being happy doesn’t mean you won’t be unhappy, and happiness isn’t a flakey feeling – it shouldn’t disappear, even though you’re having problems. It should just always be there, under the surface. So when you’re finding something difficult, you just need to look, smile, appreciate, and you’ll feel happy.

Every time you feel happy, your problems will feel smaller, and less significant and more conquerable.

There are hundreds of fun, happy songs you can listen to. Feeling sad, down, depressed and flat? Put one on. Be obvious and play “Happy” by Pharrell Williams. Go and get some dance music – and let the music’s happy beat take you out of your dark place.

If you can’t find happiness – then go and exercise, go for a run, go and draw something, but most of importantly, do something. Stop thinking and feeling unhappy, and do something with yourself, then appreciate what you’ve done. It can be big, or small. The size of the action you’ve taken isn’t the important part – but that you enjoy it, wholeheartedly, and smile at all the steps you did, to achieve it.

The fundamental part of finding happiness is to stop looking for it to knock you sideways and to find yourself brimming with joy. That’s ecstaticness – not happiness. Happiness is a habit of enjoying every moment, thing and person in your life, whether you’re having the time of your life, or the battle of your life.

Happiness isn’t something to be found, it’s there – you have it in you, but you’re not looking for it, and you’re not appreciating what you have around you.

When you stop thinking it’s unattainable, and stop hoping that something, or someone will give you happiness, that’s when you’ll find it. But most of all, find joy in everything you do, in everything you see and have.

Stand and stare in amazement at something – that’ll make you happy. When you feel it, hold onto it, melt in the feeling, and bring it with you when you appreciate something else.

Happiness, like most things in life, is a decision, a choice – it is as attainable as getting a glass of water. If you’re thirsty, what do you do? You get a glass of water. Like it’s no more complicated than walking over to the kitchen sink with a glass and filling it up.

Feeling unhappy?

Decide to be happy. It’s a choice, it’s your choice, and only you have the ability and power to really make yourself happy.

Sure, somebody, or something can make you feel happier, but it isn’t the same as true, deep, solid, unwavering, calm, happiness.

About the author

Olivia L'Estrange-Bell

23yr old English Entrepreneur. Self-Taught, with my first exam being my driving theory test. Successful photographer, horse trainer, author and entrepreneur from Dorset, England.

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